Quarter Life Crisis

Well, to begin with I wish to thank one of the orkut profiles I visited recently.... Not only did it instigate me to blog, but it also gave me a great input ! It feels great to be on the writing mode after almost a year...

Alrite, getting to action... 'Quarter Life Crisis' - the flick, mainly emphasised the love-life scenario, ofcourse, not against expectations ! Those who have seen it shall know what I am talking about, and for the rest, its about this guy in the quarter period of life, struggling with work and trying to know what he expects out of his personal life...... Naa, I am not going to talk about the love life here...

Being 22 today, hehe... yeah... thats just as old as i am !! Okay, so being 22 today, I am in a similar Quarter Life Crisis as the most of us.... Where's the career heading ??!!?? Who's the one for me ??!!?? Family ! Oh are they proud of me yet.. Am I contributing enough ??!!?? Do I have the right set of friends ??!!?? Gosh... There is no time ! So much to do... I'm so confused ! Am I gonna reach it ??!!?? Oops Money Money Money ! Am I really happy ??? Is this what I wanted to do !!!???!!!!!! Oh well ya... maybe I should get a bit spiritual and relax..... ! I am good all I need is a chill-pill and things shall be fine.....

Hmmm.. seems familiar for sure... Somethings we often face everyday... Confused.. Insecure.... Wandering... Thinking too much sometimes... Idling most of the times ;) With a big big tension at the back of the head all the time....

Okay, so what stage is this ?

It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job, and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you.

Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't. One minute you are insecure, and the next, secure.

You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. You long for love and peace but scared to accept it too. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try to cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You expect a lot out of yourself and keep increasing the to-do-list everyday. And then when you fail, you surround yourself with doubt and give-up for the day, eventually realizing you have lost track of dates. Not to forget the self-pity sometimes and the helplessness sometimes. You try to pacify and please yourself by thinking about certain achievements you did, though a few years ago or something too insignificant, not realizing that you are stopping your own growth.

You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself... and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be atleast a contender !